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1/6/2009 Valley's thoughtsValley and Co. wishes everyone a very happy, prosperous, healthy 2009..........
AND MANY OTHERS !!!!!! 9/28/2008 Valley's thoughts
Some thoughts for the "dog days" of summer.
The reason that a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue.
(Anon)
If there are no dogs in Heaven then, when I die, I want to go where they went. (Will Rogers).
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself. (Josh Billings).
A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance and to turn around three times before lying down (Robert Benchley)
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man (Mark Twain)
If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise. (Anon)
Women and cats will do as they please and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. (Robert A Heinlein)
You can say any foolish thing to a dog and the dog will give you a look that says 'Wow! You're right ! I never would've thought of that! (Dave Barry)
Dogs are not our whole life but they make our lives whole (Roger Caras)
My goal in life is to be as good a person as my dog thinks I am (Anon)
9/5/2008 valley's toughtsHello you all ! Now you know that every morning Ré and I go out for our morning walk, getting all the kinks out of our body after a looonnng sleep (in bed of course, don't ask silly questions, I wouldn't sleep anywhere else).. Well ! These past mornings, we are followed by a red CAT. This poor little thing keeps up our pace and MEOWS all the way. Other dogs frighten him but I don't seem to be the kind he runs away from. He must feel that I wish him no harm, I'm such a good kid. (Just let me get mad and you'll see if I'm good or not.) Just like the other day when that male hound made Ré keel over……He didn't know if he was male or female when I got through with him. !!!!! Wise guy. But let's not get off the subject. About the red cat. As I said, it kept following us each morning. So Ré, kind hearted bought food to feed it each day, he even started to be picky and not eat everything proposed, (haha I had extras those days). We noticed that he often went to a special door during the day, so this morning Ré asked a woman coming out of that house "Do you know if the little red cat
Can you imagine ???? A CAT POACHER !!! 8/2/2008 Valley's thoughts
You just can't imagine how sweet revenge is. I practice it quite often and I can tell you that I feel much better after that. I feel like a young dog, I jump hither and tether, Well, I just feel so goooooood. Now let me explain this to you in a few words (maybe a little more than a few).
Sneaky Ré told me the other day that we should go for a walk, now, that sounded pretty good to me, so unsuspecting , what do I do? What would you have done? I gingerly (I'm a delicate dog you know) followed. IT WAS A TRAP !!!!! She led me straight to the (shhhhhh, I won't say his name, in order not to frustrate the little ones) hair cutter's shop, you know the ones we go to with our lovely hair, and come out looking like a sheared lamb.
Now THERE is where the vengeance comes in. I started by pouting, and this was great fellers, I made like I had become DEAF, yep, and it worked. Ré was testing my hearing at least ten times a day. She called, she whistled, but I ignored her even though I was practically at her feet, I looked around smelling the air as if nothing was amidst…..
Hey now, what do you think about that fellers ?????? Good? No??? 7/12/2008 valley's thoughtsOK, I've been tagged, so now after I have pestered, growled, and what not as to where you should put the 8 info thing, I have decided to put it here. 8 ? O.M.G.
1. I get drowned by little things, big ones I sink my teeth into that.
2. I wish I were born rich instead of so darn good looking, (heh heh) In that way I'd hire a maid. I HATE
HOUSEWORK.
3. I have two nationalities. American and French.
4. I hate curse words.
5. I sing in the shower (who cares about the neighbors).
6. While living in the states, I worked at the pentagon. won't say where - secret!.
7. I like old cowboy movies, and songs from the same.
8. Hey hey, 8 already.....I cry practically at the drop of a hanky, I'm a sissy. I hate to see people sad, or ill .
7/10/2008 valley's thoughtsTag, you're it! 7/4/2008 Valley's thought38
Yes I know, I'm not very prolific these days but I'm so busy going here and there with Ré. Sometimes I wonder if I should follow her everywhere she goes, as you must know, I can't go everywhere you humans can, so I stay in the car.. Restaurants ? Are you kidding, the restaurateurs must think that we are an uncouth bunch and that we would jump all over the tables or maybe wee wee on the table legs, or what not. Who is that guy who decided that animals are dirtier than people. I have seen people whom I would not take to a restaurant even if they paid me. Now what would I do with money anyhow , put it in my pocket? Where did you see a pocket ? HEY, I WANT A POCKET…….. I WANT MONEY, I WANT TO GET MARRIED, I WANT TO SLEEP IN PYJAMA TOPS. Ah come on, let's not blow our top. Now where was I. Oh yes not being able to go everywhere you humans do. What about the stupid market, can't go there either, probably for the same reason as the restaurants. I think I'd be satisfied just staying home once in a while just to do like the other guys. Sitting on the balcony barking at everything that moves down below…..We'd have a H… of a time insulting each other, seeing who could yell the loudest and who could spit the furthest, naw dogs don't spit, it's the Lamas that do that. Well they could teach us…. HEY I WANT A LAMA !!!!! 5/4/2008 Valley's thoughtsT'was the week before christmas !!!!!!!
Remember what you do at that time? Yep, write to Santa, or if you are very pious , then you write to "little Jesus" , well my neighbours are very pious. Having that information, let me tell you about that certain little boy, (no I will not call him a little demon, but I'll think it).
He was writing his letter for Christmas. I got this info. from his parents.
Little Jesus, if you bring me a red bicycle for Christmas, I will clean my room everyday.
This did not seem to please him so he tore up the letter and started again;
Little Jesus, if you bring me a red bicycle for Christmas, I will clean my room once a week.
The little darling tore that letter up too.
Then crossing the room he picked up a statuette from his dresser, and packed it up in newspaper
and pushed it under his bed, then started up a new letter.
Little Jesus, if ever you want to see your mother again, you'll bring me a red bicycle for Christmas.....
5/3/2008 Valley's thoughts For those who use lawn mowers
Dept. of Agriculture Bulletin 265
SOME NOTES ON THE OPERATION OF ROTARY LAWN MOWERS
Power-driven rotary lawn mowers are a great boon to shiftless suburdanites whose lawn are full of dandelions, buckhorn and other weeds too tall for the real-type, or conventional grass cutters.
The rotary mower, hower, is not an unmixed blessing. Unseen rocks and sticks to say nothing of the unburied bones, will raise hell with the blades, so will nails, bits of wire and other metal debris.
But these problems pale into insignificance when compared with the unhappy result of running a rotary lawn mower over newly-deposited dog excrement (shall we say dog s---). Until you have had your shoes shined with pulverized dog s--- you cannot appreciate the extent of this problem.
Cat s---, to be sure, smells worse, but cats do not s---as much as dogs, unless you have very small dogs and/or very large cats.
There are a number of approaches to the problem of animal excreta, vis-avis the rotary lawn mower but, unfortunately, no real solution. First, of course, you can try to keep dogs (and cats) away from your lawn. The only effective method for doing this is to buy a dog bigger and ornrier than any other dog in the neighborhood and train him to chase other dogs off your grass and (B) to s--- on the neighbor's lawns. There are obvious drawbacks to this method of combatting the problem.
First, of course, there is always the chance that one of your neighbors wll hire a cow and train it to deposit cow flops on your lawn. It has been estimated that a rotary lawn mower operating at 3450 R.P.M. can hurl a normal deposit of cow s---as high as your second-story windows and over the area of 500 sq. ft.
Building a fence is a possible solution, but expensive. It is in addition, no good unless you can train your wife and children to keep the gates shut. And, then too, some dogs will jump fences, even when full of s---.
There are various commercial preparations, sold mostly to evel-minded old women, which are supposed to discourage dogs for (A) hopping lady dogs on your front stoop, or (B) peeing on your shrubs. These chemicals are worthless since it is second nature for dogs to hop or pee. just as it is in most humans. Even if these preparations did work, of course, they would not solve the problem created by the rotary lawn mowers.
This leaves three other possible solutions, I.E.
1. let the bloomin weeds grow
2. Move into an appartment and use the rotary mower as a window fan.
3. Wear brown shoes when mowing and associate only with people who either do not mind the smell of dog s--- or who are too polite to mention it to you.......
Hey fellers, this is Valley. Don't give Ré any more ideas for a page (ex. a story about a lawn mower) she will dig up all sorts of stupid stories You will notice that I am not as complicated............... 4/18/2008 Valley's thoughtsDon't put off until tomorrow what you can do today !! I was just wondering
if you could use that motto when you are a dog. Now let me see..... don't put off
going out to sniff, but then you have to have someone take you out if you live in an
appartment, so that's no good. Don't put off eating a nice hardy meal, ....got to have
someone GIVE it to you. And I could go on and on... Which goes to show that
we poor mutts do not have the life of "Rieley" (hey you irish people, is that
spelled right?), whoever he was, at any rate I keep hearing the phrase...
Let's not get off the subject. Don't put off tomorrow etc. You humans should think
about all this. Don't put off until tomorrow, treating your dogs like kings or queens,
letting them sleep next to you in bed (they like their comfort) taking them out with you
everywhere you go. don't leave them behind. Have you ever looked at their
eyes as they see you depart and leave them behind ? Do you know that saying
"it's later than you think"
Now as I look back, I don't think that these few words are very gay. I guess I'm
as morose as the weather. I'd like a little SUN. I WANT SUN,
I WANT SUN !!!! 3/31/2008 english speaking "You can bring a cat to water but you can't make it mink",
Well you can bring a dog to the computer but you can't make it write.
So I'm lazy, so what !!! What with this rain and bad weather,
how can you ask a poor house dog to go out without a coat,
looking for writing matter..... that's right Ré never bought me
a shawl nor a coat nor even a scarf. How can you expect me to
go out and freeze my little........... paws ..
What did you say there in the back row ? Shame on her ? YEAH.......
There I was writing like a fiend, my mind awake, and raring to go,
but there are the important things in life, like FOOD, so now that I have eaten,
I must take my beauty nap. Another excuse for doing nothing,
don't be surprised, I told you I was a loafer, don't say you weren't warned. 3/23/2008 english speaking HELLO , all my pals hello Henry. Thought I'd drop by to tell you that I have thought of coming back
regularly, I stopped because I couldn't think of anything interesting to talk about, I already said
all I could about all the buddies in the street and they were starting to look at me with side glances. So
Ré was tired of being pulled behind bushes every time I saw a pal I had knocked down, (verbally of course,
I'm the peace and love type). As for the cats, they didn't understand what in the world I was talking
about anyhow, so I could look at them straight in the eye. Once in a while I would get that word "phtt"
the cats use just to say hello, or somtimes they would just ignore me. (but who cares anyhow)
This is just a test, if I feel funny or courageous, ( quoteing someone I heard) " I'll be back. " 10/11/2007 english speakingSince everyone has forgotten me, I may as well write to myself. Hello Valley, how are you big girl? 6/19/2006 valley's thoughts Have you ever seen a thing called a LIZARD, Well I had never. They sneak out of bushes, under rocks, in fact under anything they can hide...I have spent 3 weeks trying to catch at least ONE; to no avail....in vain....niet....nada....rien....nix....not one tail did I get my sharp little teeth into . There is one good thing about lizard hunting. I lost a few pounds. Ré is happy about that because she says it is easier for her to carry me. Woof Woof....
I must also tell you that I had a little row with the big buddy I went to see. There I was, minding my own business, looking for other places to find an unconscious or sleeping lizard, and there comes fatso telling me that I was to come into the house. I told him I was busy and to mind his own business. But no, he had to insist, he even went to get his human in order to drive me into the house. Heh Heh, of course I finally had to because he dragged me by the scruff of the neck. (hey he's 5 times (or more) bigger than me) But I got even with him later "the scab". When his human gave him his snack, I jumped on it and growled so he wouldn't approach it. Dat-el-loin-im......
Now I'm back to my balcony, my buddies down below, and my couch, and arm chairs. No more lizards in view. I shall gain back the couple of pounds that I had lost, and become a big fat lazy mutt again.....  5/2/2006 Valley's thoughtsI just had to tell someone how sad I am. I just lost one of my big Pals. When I go there, he won't be there to treat me like a queen, walk beside me, see that nothing happens to me while I'm in the garden . Goodbye my dear friend, may your rest be sweet, and the angels take care of you as you have always taken care of me. I'll not forget you Folgo. 5/1/2006 Valley's thoughtsYou may think that I am forever bragging. The stories that I tell you are not really tails; (ooops , tales) , They are taken from real facts. So, knowing that, you will know that this story is a true story. I live in an apartment building and , and it is a special one, due to special events. We have "flying kamikaze cats ".. Yep. One flew from the 7th story, and one from the 6th story, and another, not as pretentious , flew from the 3rd story window. This last one was found by my predecessor , who liked cats as much as I do , He was (shhhhh) a French Poodle. Ré told him to find a wounded cat, and he found it in a bush, right near the building. I must tell you right now , that all of them are either still living or lived to a ripe old age, so stop your ohhhhhh and ahhhhhh, and read on…. I really don't know what those cats have in their brain, don't they see that there is a distance between them and the floor way way down below ? Do they think that during their flight they will grow wings, or that some fairy God Mother will wish them a motor ? I am quite friendly with one of those cats, but I never thought of asking him about his flight . I don't know if he would have started his story with a loud PHTTTT; meaning, "mind your own darn business", or that he would be too ashamed to just open his mouth. Which brings me to this question ,, DID THEY JUMP, OR WERE THEY SHOVED…..Naw, they all have good humans, who were very glad to see them back…….Ha, you never see one of US jumping out of ANYWHERE. In fact, when we have to jump out of a PLANE (para. Dogs,) they have to CARRY us out. 4/20/2006 valley's thoughtsTHE OUTCOME………. Oh come on now, can't you remember from one story to the other ? The trip !!!!!!!! No matter what I do, I'm trapped……My ticket has been bought. What is that ? Yes of course first class, I couldn't imagine travelling otherwise. We are leaving soon, so you will have to shift for yourselves until I come back. I know, I know, you'll miss me, but what can I do ? I have to follow, since some wise guy invented the leash for us poor mutts. In the past, (very distant) we dogs used to wander here and there and no-one told us where to go or dragged us by a leash. We were free bodies………Of this I am certain, because stories have been handed down from dog to dog. What on earth do you think we talk about, when we meet in the streets. We are not all a bunch of uncouth, stupid, or unlearned hounds …. While you talk up a storm, we pass on the good word. Now where was I, oh yes the trip…….. If you are good I shall give you the details when I come back. Unless of course it has been an uneventful journey. Ha, it better not be, because I don't move that far, FOR NOTHING !!!!!!!! Where on earth can I dig up my writing matter , if I stay cooped up in one room …. Or for that matter just sit around and play ball? I'm a working dog. You can't imagine what I go through to get my subjects; 4/12/2006 Valley's thoughtsAooooow, yipe yipe, They got me fellers; Ré dragged me to the Vet. Yes, I said dragged and I mean it. I just laid there on the sidewalk and everyone passing by stared at us, but I didn't care, I wasn't going in there on my own free will. Ré tried to pull on the leash, but I was too heavy, she finally, with shame on her face, picked me up and carried me in . I know the act by heart, I do this every time. She should be used to this, and do just one thing. LEAVE ME ALONE !!!!!!! The humans call it a "rappel" (for the French poodles), for me all it means is that every year, they stick a needle in me filled with all sorts of POISON ……For rabies , liver illness, and who knows what else. All I know is that I feel horrible after that. And of course all afternoon I pout…….What does she think anyhow, that she will get away with it. ? HA;!! Plotting revenge is fun. !!!!!!! One thing is good about those shots, I don't get washed for a couple of days after that. The weather is getting better and I can now, roll in the grass without being called upon to "stop getting dirt all over you, you hear ?" Of course I hear, what do you think, I'm deaf !!!! But I make like I am……..Woof Woof…… 4/8/2006 Valley's thoughtsSpecial for the French Poodles
Je suis un chien, ou plus exactement, une chienne. et alors, tu n'as jamais vu un chien taper à la machine ?? Je n'ai jamais été à l'école en France alors il ne faut pas espérer grand chose de ma part ; En plus d'être un animal, tu voudrais aussi que j'écrive un Français parfait ? Tu rigoles ? Un chien savant ? Où tu as vu ça jouer.. Bon je te raconte, eh toi au troisième rang, on ne dort pas ici. C'est a l'école que l'on dort……. Bon ! J'ai écrit pas mal d'histoires en Anglais, avec l' espoir que tu fasses un effort pour me lire, mais je ne vois pas beaucoup de "Frenchies" se précipiter sur ce blog. Pourquoi est- ce toujours les autres qui devraient faire l' effort. Enfin je te raconte… Cette fois -ci c'est bon. J'ai une amie qui me sort renifler par ci- par- là, et à entendre les autres l'appeler, il me semble qu'elle se nomme Ré. Je rencontre pas mal de copains et de copines . Nous discutons (avec les chats c'est un peu plus difficile car ils ont un langage à part , chaque phrase commence par PFT.) sur beaucoup de choses et forcément a propos des humains. Et alors, si tu étais un chien tu parlerais de quoi toi ???? Pour un peu que j'ai aussi parler à ton chien ou ton chat. Woof Woof, je ne te dis pas, mais je ris, voila qui serrait bien……Tu vois ça d'ici ? Tu te promènes dans la rue fière ,comme trois petits bancs ,(Artaban , pour les niais ) et MOI JE SAIS !!! Woof Woof……….. 4/2/2006 Valley's thoughtsFurther up, I explained to you that I would do anything in order not to go back trekking throught those trains. Well, my dear friends, the time has come for me to put my thinking cap on and try to find the excuse for me not to go. Ré has been plotting a new trip. If I had someone here, near me, a dog pal or even a cat pal to counterplot, it would help me out. But the only buddies up close are the guys next door and I don't often see them. Of course there is the speedy cat ,
 who dashes in the house every time she can, but all she does is look around to see if there is anything new in order to tell her dog sister about it.  But I am getting away from my story. I hope you are still following....  ..Stay awake there you inside that green hat......The new trip, remember ?  In a way, maybe it could be interesting, because the humans are going to baptize a new little girl. And of course there shall be many people, and "many people " means much "food".  Hey this may not be too bad after all. Before I start to linp or whine, I shall have to look into this with more philosophy.....(heh heh get that big word ?  maybe talking to snobbish dogs is doing me some good after all ).....I will have to think this over calmly (posément = translation for the French poodles). I of course will tell you about " the outcome" 
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